Men & Tattoo

Ok so tell me why!! Why do I have to keep talking to him! I don’t know what it is... I can see the real person inside of him... the person he wants to be but is to scared and hurt to even try again... he tried and then back out again... either way if he is never ready I will always want him in my life yea know? I know that I need him in my life; I just wonder if he needs me in his life, there is this saying that says hmm... I think it goes if they don’t need you in their life then you don’t need them.. Or something gay like that..... but yea know I was thinking (like always) its true... no relationship (whether it be friendship, family or more) its never going to work on a one way street... like me and Johnny he wants to forget about me and just see that other chick.... cool, he wants to ditch me... ok well I’m going to stop trying to be his friend Apparently I’m the only one that really wants to be his friend.... I love that boy... but I know it’s just not right, but Nathanael.... I think that’s another story... even just as friends... I think that he is a very important part of my life but I’m not sure why.... I do know that he makes me feel beautiful! And smart and funny.... I love that... and he is just more, and I see it... I just wish he would stop pretending like i dont know what im talking about and that I see it; i see him!!!

I want that tattoo!!! Like on my wrist of something like that! Its beautiful, it represents that my heart is still growing and has more to give... or something like that! lol that’s what I see when I see it... to me when I look at it I see healing, you know when a new plant starts blossoming... and its starting new...im starting new adn im healing.. a little at a time, yea know? it just makes sense and it means a lot of things to me... do you know what I mean? Does that make sense!?!? have you ever seen something and it just makes sense to you.. adn usually no one else (but me :D) lol we all know how I ramble! hahaha tonight my roommate heather gets home from a trip, we are going to try out my fake ID.. lol last time i went with a bunch of way older people so this time I’m wondering how it will work out... cuz heather just turned 21! lol but oh well that’s going to be the fun part... right?? We could always go to the kiddy club if we can get in lol!!! My tummy hurts........ I’m hungry!!!!!!!!!

I love you lyssybird...... MUAH!